“12 I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. 13 I can do all this through him who gives me strength.”

One of the most amazing things about going through a trial like I am doing currently, God has shown me over and over and over again that it is possible to have joy during the worst times of your life. I never used to believe that that was possible, but I can honestly tell you that it is true because I have experienced it firsthand.   So how do you find and experience total joy in the midst of complete chaos?

First, you must understand that joy, like love, isn’t contingent or based on what happens around you.  It is a state of mind that can be achieved when you focus on what is good and not what is terrible around you.  You can choose to love someone if they are terrible to you just like you can choose to be happy when someone delivers the most crushing painful news to in the world.  The way that I learned to do that is to immediately turn to God and say “I do not know why you allowed this and I do not know what your plan is but I know that everything that you do is built to prosper me and not harm me” (Jeremiah 29:11).

Second, you must believe that what is to come of your future will be better than what was (Job 42:12).  When you are in the battle of good and evil, you believe that the best part of your life is over, that you will never recover and that the future only holds torture and despair.  That is of the devil and not from God.  God desires you to learn from you mistakes and to use those mistakes to make His kingdom better.  Who can you share your story with that will change their life?

Lastly, you must force yourself at first to see the good that God has done in your life.  For me, the first thing that I did was to remember how I felt the day that God delivered my lady back to me the first time 13 years ago after I had given up and felt it was impossible.  God can do the impossible (Matthew19:26).  A God that can do that in the midst of that mess is a God that can do anything.  I made myself recall every answered prayer that God gave me big or small and it made me realize that God did far more for me than I realized and that I needed to be thankful for what He has done.  The best example that anyone ever showed me of this was when I was separated from my wife and had to spend thanksgiving alone. I went back to my roots and cooked turkey and served food to a homeless shelter and it was so powerful that I served food for 4 hours with tears in my eyes.  I hope one day you can experience that kind of joy in the pain and feat that I was going through.

In closing, if you are in crisis, choose to be joyful!   Find out what makes you happy, and go do it (as long as it honor God).  Find out what others around you need and go fill that void.  Beg God to forgive you and ask him what he wants you to do for others that will take your mind off your pain.  God has made so many heroes this way.  I desire to be happy living in the belly of a 30 foot boat instead of when I should be on a gorgeous waterfront paradise with a gorgeous blonde by my side.  Do you desire to have the best part of your life yet to come or to have it be what you just lost?  The choice is yours!